10/28/10

10/27/10

Hello, all.  I hope that this Wednesday finds you well.  I am doing well emotionally.  I am not allowing my mind to wander to dark places as the pain still lingers from my hips to my upper chest.  I will be meeting with my oncologist tomorrow and we will work on a pain management plan among preparations for my fourth round of chemo.  Yay, fourth round!

One thing I have noticed with this pain, maybe some of you can relate, is that I tend to react quickly and at times sharply in situations.  When I say sharp, I definitely don't mean with intelligence.  Pain has the ability to change someone's personality because it causes so much hurt.  In the midst of this situation, I am working through the pain and the "sharpness" that sputters out of my mouth if I am not careful.

Last night at small group we were finishing up James 4: 13-17.  In a nutshell, this section is about the importance of following God's will in your life.  At times, especially when we are seeing success, we tend to leave God out of our plans.  We often say that we are going to do this and that over the next year and in reality all we know is the present day.  As you all know, Eric and I know fully what this passage means.  We had plans for our marriage celebration and for the first year of marriage, but obviously those plans have changed and changed again.  As my father says:  the one thing we can count on is that our plans will change.  :o)  God is fully in control of our life.  We know this.  Being in such a desperate situation allows a person to choose bitterness and denial or joy and a conquering heart.  Eric and I choose the latter with God leading our way.

James 4: 15 It would be best to say, "If it is the Lord's will and we live long enough, we hope to do this project or pursue this dream."  

10/26/10

10/25/10

10/21/10

10/21/20

A blog will be coming soon.  I am off to the airport to get my sister!  I am waiting to get permission to post a story from yesterday.  (I hope I get it!  It is a God Moment!)

I am doing well!  Love you all!

10/19/10 My Birthday!

10/18/10

10/15/10

10/14/10

10/13/10

10/12/10

10/11/10

Today was the first day of my grieving process through my journey with cancer.  All of a sudden a blanket of sadness and despair fell over me when I woke up from my nap this morning.  I long for my old life, my life free from sickness.  I long for having a normal day.  I long for doing whatever whenever I want.  I called my mother.  And she listened to me grieve.  I called my father, too.  And he listened to me grieve.  I am so thankful for my parents.  And in the midst of it, my eric called.  Just checking in.  And he listened, too.

Today was a hard day.  But I have much to be thankful for 1) I am alive, 2) I have my nausea under control -- my friend Monica is struggling with this, and 3) I have a disease that most people have heard about and understand -- my friend Leita is struggling with this.

Shine bright, firefly, shine bright.

Just some thoughts . . .

10/10/10

Pumpkin Patch Day Photos!

October 7th

October 6th

October 5th

So I am a couple of days out from chemo and I am tired.  Today my body aches, but I am chipper.  I had 2 guests helping me today.  

Tonight Eric and I will go to small group and sing praises to the Lord for the healing that He has done and will do in the future.   We will bask in the community that has surrounded us through so much.  Tonight is worship night:  which means anything goes.  We will be mostly catching up with each other in a deep way and sharing verses that have stood out the past week.  I love worship night, the music melting harden hearts and bringing us back to God.

Shine Bright, Firefly, Shine Bright

Just some thoughts . . .

October 4th

Chemo Round 3 Day 3

October 1st